


explain

by carrionkid



Series: tumblr requests 2018 [3]
Category: Marvel (Comics), X-Factor (Comics), X-Men (Comicverse)
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, Late Night Conversations, M/M, Mentions of homophobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-05
Updated: 2018-06-05
Packaged: 2019-05-18 10:30:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14851082
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carrionkid/pseuds/carrionkid
Summary: in case you still want prompt: rictor trying to explain to shatterstar why strong guy makes jokes about their relationship (and why it bothers rictor so much)here's a request fill for anonymous on tumblr! star and ric try to cuddle but just end up talking about friendship and the rest of the team and how well meaning people can still hurt you--“I do not believe the rest of the team likes me.”Star’s stopped asking for clarifications about situations and emotions until they’re alone, and this might be part of the reason why. Before, he never hesitated to lean over and ask Rictor to clarify something, but Ric’s noticed the absence of that habit in the past couple of weeks.





	explain

“I do not believe the rest of the team likes me.”

 

Star’s stopped asking for clarifications about situations and emotions until they’re alone, and this might be part of the reason why. Before, he never hesitated to lean over and ask Rictor to clarify something, but Ric’s noticed the absence of that habit in the past couple of weeks.

 

They’re sitting in bed together, tangled up and touching aimlessly, no goal other than getting as close as possible. It’s one of the nights where Star’s not only open to something close to cuddling but also actively seeking it out. Those nights are always Ric’s favorite.

 

He presses his fingers into the soft skin of Star’s back, rubbing circles with enough pressure that Star can actually enjoy it, “It’s not that, Star, it’s just… You were gone a long time, and the whole Cortex thing, and they’re still a little on edge about it.”

 

“That was not  _ me,”  _ Star says, Rictor can feel him tensing as if to strike, “That was  _ something  _ using the body as a  _ tool _ .”

 

“I know that,” Rictor says, moving one hand over Star’s heart, pulse fluttering against his fingers, unspoken way to tell him to calm down, “They know that too, they’re just adjusting.”

 

“I still feel as if they are all in on a joke of which I do not understand,” Star sighs; Ric can feel him unwind a little bit, relaxing into his touch.

 

Fuck. This is a conversation he knew was coming one day but also kind of desperately wanted to avoid. Which was a bad idea because now he’s horribly underprepared. Trying to explain all of  _ this  _ to  Star is the kind of thing he’s been having anxiety dreams about for the past month and a half.

 

While he tries to work up the nerve to say something, he works his hands through Star’s hair. It’s strange for it to be so short now, but it’s easier to rake his nails across Star’s scalp. By now, he’s totally nailed the technique required to get Star to hum happily.

 

“It’s not you, Starshine, I promise.”

 

Star’s arms wrap around his stomach, pulling him in as close as possible, “Then what is it? It is  _ something,  _ I know it is but I do not understand  _ what  _ and I find it irritating.”

 

“I’ll try, Star, but this isn’t easy,” Rictor sighs, “And I don’t know if you’ll get it, but I’ll try.”

 

Star’s frowning, looking down at him, “It is something with which you are not comfortable either. I know you better than anyone else and that is the clearest part of this situation. I do not understand what makes you uncomfortable but I can tell that you are on guard around other members of the team.”

 

“It’s not that they don’t like you,” Rictor says, still circling his hands through Star’s hair, “They don’t like  _ us.  _ Well, most of the team is just a little bit uncomfortable.”

 

“I  _ know  _ we do not align with the typical Earth standard, but they are your friends, yes?”

 

“God,” Ric groans, the only thing keeping him calm is how close he is to Star, “They are, but sometimes even people who mean well can be dicks about things.”

 

“Like Guido?”

 

Guido’s definitely not well meaning. He’s a bit of an asshole, temperamental as fuck, and has no idea when he takes something too far. And yet they’re still technically friends. They probably wouldn’t be friends if they weren’t living in the same building, but Ric can’t exactly start a fight with the guy a couple rooms over.

 

“No, Star,” he’s moved to carefully tracing fingers over Star’s cheeks, “He says shit to get a rise out of people and has no idea of how far is too far. And he takes things too far  _ a lot.  _ He’s crossed a lot of lines.”

 

“Oh.”

 

Star doesn’t sound disappointed so much as he sounds confused. Rictor doesn’t blame him, it’s not like there’s a handbook for dealing with all of your friend group being vaguely weird about you and your boyfriend. He’s just a little bit better at navigating it than Star and well aware of all the jokes being made about the two of them.

 

“Why do you remain friends with him if this is the situation?” 

 

There’s no righteous fury in Star’s voice, just gentle concern. At least Rictor won’t have to worry about him hunting down Guido in an attempt to make things even.

 

“The same reason I’m still friends with Rahne,” Rictor sighs, he can’t quite meet Star’s eyes anymore, “He’s a dick but not any more than basically anyone else on Earth. It could always be worse and I’d have, like, two friends if I stopped being friends with anyone who said something vaguely homophobic to me.”

 

“But it  _ hurts  _ you,” Star’s becoming more urgent, more anxious, fingernails digging into Rictor’s skin, “I know you and I have seen it in you.”

 

“Yeah,” Ric laughs, a hollow sound, “It does.”

 

“I do not want you to hurt, but I do not understand this enough to  _ help. _ ”

 

“Star,” Rictor guides him closer until their foreheads are touching, eyes closed, “Starshine, listen to me, that’s their problem. Not yours.”

 

“If it hurts you, it  _ is  _ my problem.”

 

He can feel Star’s hands on his shoulders, moving carefully up to tangle in his hair. Even with the super heavy discussion, this is still a perfect moment. Ideally, Rictor would spend eternity trying to learn every part of Star. He’d learn every way to make him feel loved and safe and comfortable. He’d learn every weird little way Star tells him that he loves him and every weird little way to say it back. It  was hard at first, trying to figure out what was okay and what wasn’t, but now it’s much easier. They’ve always been in tune with each other, for better or worse.

 

“Nothing anyone could say to me would ever,  _ ever,  _ change how I feel about you, okay?”

 

Star makes a quiet noise, one of confirmation, of understanding.

 

“Good,” Rictor wraps his arms around Star’s waist, gently pulling him down until they’re lying with their legs tangled, “And you know what? I love you. A lot.”


End file.
